Advent Prayer

Lord, meet me, join me. Make my aim, Lord, this Advent to bring joy to You through the giving of myself-my time, my plans, my agenda-for You to use. My gift to myself to You must take priority over my gifts to my family and friends. After all, it is Your birthday we are celebrating-not mine, not my children's, not my husbands. Part of my gift to you is loving the people you have put in front of me, those who are easy to love and those who are not. I want to give You my response to lonely people around the world-the orphan, the widow, the ones who are all alone, the ones who others have passed by. But, I do not know how to respond. Forgive me when I do not take the opportunities you have put in front of me. May an awareness of your presence fill me every moment of my day so that rather than You being squeezed out of my busyness, I will be aware of You walking with me as my shepherd. You are the only one this advent season who can help me find those ordinary yet amazing experiences of joy that You provide with such grace and mercy and love amongst all the responsibilities, pressures, and heartaches of this world. (Author Unknown) I wrote this prayer in my journal last Christmas. I failed to write down the author's name, but they expressed so clearly my emotions and my words. On Christmas Day, last year, we formally applied to adopt from Ethiopia. The homestudy/dossier process took the first six months, and then the waiting began. As I "wait" for her face to be revealed, I can only meditate on His promise to me. "Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God's spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don't know how or what to pray, it doesn't matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans. He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God. That's why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good." Romans 8:26-28. The Message.

Waiting Well

I knew this would happen. I predicted it in my first post, and have been upset with myself for the last 4 months since my last post. Not that I did not have plenty to write about, I just could not get it on paper. Could it be writers block? Or could it be laziness? I have had many topics in my head, just didn't take the time or energy to jot them down. (I think about my son, during his 6th grade state writing exams. He got himself so worked up that he actually cried. Yep, a 6th grade boy brought to tears over the anxiety of writing. Luckily his guidance counselor talked him through it, and he actually scored one of the highest in the state.) Perhaps that is me, afraid of how it sounds instead of just getting it out. Whatever the case, I am here now. WAITING. And I really want to WAIT WELL. What does that look like? For me, that could look like many hours a day shopping, or reading, or exercising (ha!) or just wasting time. All my kids are in school, for the first time in 15 years, I have the day to myself. That is not how I want to spend my day. I want to serve. I want to worship. I want to bless others with the gift of time. I want to be intentional. I want to be still and listen. Really still. I do know this about myself. I do not like to be at home, especially when it is quiet. When I find myself here, and it is quiet, I turn on music. I pray. I talk to my cats:) I don't like to be alone. Not sure why that is, but I really need to get over it. I need to be ok with where I am today. Not longing for the future, or the next stage of my life, waiting for the next little one to fill my time and my thoughts. I want to be patient during the wait. Patient with my husband, my kids. God has brought me to my knees with one of my kids more during this wait than ever in my life. All of the sudden our lives have been turned upside down on many days. As I am teaching my child to surrender to me, God is teaching me to surrender to Him. He doesn't always give us what we want in these situations, He gives us what He wants us to have. When I want peace, He wants me to have faith. When I want obedience, He is teaching me to connect. Not what I want, but what I need. All during the wait. I also want to be grateful. So thankful for those who have chosen to bless us with their prayers, their money and their support during this wait. Simple words do not seem sufficient, yet it has to be. To allow others on this journey to our little girl. How awesome that is, she already belongs to many. Bella told me today--Mom, every kid in our family is adopted. I replied to her that Nico is not. And we were then reminded that EVEN Nico is adopted into God's family. Even Nico. That says a lot:) Waiting well, how does that look for your family?

Asking for help

July 9, 2011


Dear Family and Friends,

Although this letter has been forming in our hearts for many months, it is still difficult to write.
You already know our unique family. You also know that God has laid it on our hearts, time and time again, to open our home to children. These past 14 years have been full of the trials and blessings only children can bring. They have shown us more about life and the Lord’s love than we ever could have imagined. It is because of the many children who have called us mom and dad that we are once again stepping out in faith to welcome another child into our family.

This decision was not easy. It is grounded in prayer, and patience; listening to God’s call and our struggles to obey, culminating in our willingness to respond. We always thought that because we had our home open to children in foster care that we once again would adopt a child from our community. But God’s plans are always bigger than we can imagine.

On Christmas Day of last year, we applied to adopt a little girl from Ethiopia. As you can imagine, international adoptions are expensive. It doesn’t seem fair. There are approximately 163 million orphans world wide. Why does it cost so much to bring one child into a forever family? Although we cannot answer this, we know that once God laid it on our hearts to adopt a little girl with special needs, specifically HIV+, we could not turn away. Our eyes had been opened and our hearts exposed to the needs of these vulnerable children.

We also began to educate ourselves and to understand how manageable HIV is here in the US and how effective the medication treatments have become. But, that is not the case with HIV+ children living in other parts of the world, especially Africa. So, this leads us to international adoption and the costs of the financial obligations we must overcome to bring a child home.

We are asking for your help.
We know all too well just how difficult it is to ask for help. It is humbling to have to reach out to others, as our pride seems to always get in the way. Our family, over the last 12 months, has been saving and preparing for this adoption. Luka and Mika have surprised us with their initiative to raising awareness and raising funds for the adoption in their own simple way. They are

making potholders, and so far they have raised over $400. Nico has also reached out to neighbors offering his “dog walking” services to help defray some of the costs. Bella has also demonstrated her desire to meet her new sister through her willingness to share her toys, her clothes, and her shoes. Although we have some funds at our disposal, we still need help.

We appreciate and cherish your friendship and would like to invite you on this journey with us.
We know that when God is involved, money is never the focus of the issue. So, upfront and foremost, we ask of you to support us with your prayers.

1) Prayer – Please pray for the little girl God has chosen for our family. That He watches over her, keeps her safe, and that she is receiving the medical care that her little body desperately needs. Please also pray for our extended family. We realize that this decision to adopt a child with HIV will have consequences across our family, friends, and our community. Although we understand the facts of HIV (we have included a facts sheet for you to read) much of the world still does not. There still is a strong negative stigma attached to HIV and we know that the road ahead will at times be difficult and ugly. This fact lays heavily on our conscious, but we know that God will be with us. Please, also pray that as we educate, advocate, and bring awareness to this horrible disease, our daughter will be protected and will respond well to the medical treatments. And most importantly, that God would be glorified in the process.

2) Financial Support – We are blessed with the opportunity to raise funds through our church with a matching grant from an organization called “Lifesong”. As many of you know, we have been actively involved with the foster, adoption, and orphan care ministry at Covenant Church for the last five years. What a privilege and joy it has been to share our love of mission to the orphans and to watch our church community open their hearts to “the least of these”. We are also honored to be the first recipients of this matching grant, which will enable families to breech the financial gap usually present in adoptions. Part of our pledge is to continue to help other families interested in adoption, foster care and orphan care, now and in the future.

Lifesong (www.lifesongfororphans.org), a trusted organization administering the funds, will pay adoption expenses out of funds received. Lifesong has graciously set up a fundraising account for us to help pay the remaining $12,000.00 in adoption expenses.

If you would like to be part of financially helping us, you can send your donation directly to Lifesong between now and September 1, 2011 to the address below.

Please make checks payable to: Lifesong
In the memo section please write: “Preference Munari #2092 Adoption”.

Mail checks to:
Lifesong for Orphans
Att: Munari #2092 Adoption
PO Box 40 / 202 N. Ford St.
Gridley, IL 61744

*Your contribution is fully tax deductible. In following with IRS guidelines, your donation is to Lifesong which retains full discretion and control over its use.

Thank you for not only walking beside us on this journey, but also for your prayers and support as we step out in faith, seeking a little girl somewhere in Ethiopia, in need of a forever family. As brothers and sisters in Christ “Once our eyes are opened, we cannot pretend we don’t know what to do. God who weighs our hearts and keeps our souls knows that we know, and hold us responsible to act (Proverbs 24:12).

Blessings,

Marco, Michelle, Nico, Luka, Mika, and Isabella

Our Mother's Day Prayer

Heavenly Father,
Thank you for meeting us where we are as your children and help us to realize that we are here today for your sake and not ours.
As we gather in worship this morning, we bow before you and praise you for the display of Your perfection in the mothers You have gifted to us. For those who comfort, those who nourish, and those who encourage our daily walk with You.
For those who are moms here today, Please help us delight in our children, celebrate who they are, slow down and listen to their hearts, teach them grace, and cherish our time with them. May we do so because of You in us. May we communicate Your gentleness, Your compassion and Your sensitivity.
And for those moms who are having a difficult time mothering well, may You provide for us patience, gratitude and an eagerness to walk more closely with You.
For those who have lost their mothers, Lord
May You bring them comfort as they honor the joy their mothers brought into their lives. For those whose mothers are still living but in decline, give them the grace to uphold their moms with dignity and to allow them to cherish the time you've given to them.
For those who are here this morning and are yearning to become mothers,
May the desires of their hearts be Your will. May we understand your perfect timing and that Your plans for us are greater than all we could ever imagine. In any circumstance Lord, may we be able to say that "You are enough."
For the birthmothers who know what it feels like to place a child in the arms of another, trusting that they are making the best decisions for their child,
May we honor them today. May we never forget the sacrifices they made by choosing to carry the life inside of them.
For the moms in our community and around the world who have chosen the sanctity of life, Lord, but now are struggling to care for their children.
May the Body of Christ bring them comfort and strength, may we be Your hands and feet to them in times of sorrow and distress.
May we see their trials as an opportunity not to judge, but to step out, believing in Your strength to help, instead of letting our limitations defeat us. May we walk alongside these women and their children by providing them a safe place to seek refuge and by sharing Your love with them.
For the moms who cannot care for their children due to poverty, violence, abuse, addiction, and HIV/AIDS,
For those who cannot parent due to the social stigma of their condition,
May we be eager to join you as the Father to the Fatherless and may you use us as an extension of Your Holy hand.
May we grow to understand that by being adopted into Your family as weak and powerless sinners, we have the obligation to care for those who are weak and powerless in this world.
And it is for THESE children, Lord, that we also pray.
These children that You created so wonderfully and knit together in their mother's womb.
These children who were NOT a mistake and now live in a broken world.
For the children of Uganda, who have been left behind and imprisoned, at no fault of their own.
For the children of Ethiopia who are starving, malnourished and sick.
And for the children of Zimbabwe who are too young to care for their siblings, but do so anyway. Everyday and everynight.
For the children in Asia and Europe who are sold into trafficking and never have a chance to learn to trust those who care for them.
For the children of Casa Hogar who live daily without their moms and now will not feel the loving arms of the many moms and dads from this church and many others, due to violence in the city where they live.
For those children waiting right in our own backyard who are older and pray everynight for a forever family to love them.
And for those who just need a temporary home, a safe place to lay their heads amd be tucked in at night. A place to hear--"You are adored".
May we seek opportunities to welcome these children into our hearts, into our homes and into our church.
May we pay attention to Your treasures and lavish Your love upon them.
May we simply ask oursleves how we can make a deposit in ONE child today, loving others as we love ourselves, pursuing with a passion "the least of these."
Lord,
Break our hearts for what breaks yours. Help us to open our eyes, to have the courage to look into the faces of these children, to learn their names and love them as You love us. These are Your beloved children and as a Body of Christ we are held responsible for caring for them. Help us to open our hearts and our homes to those who need a safe place, who need to feel the love of a mom and a dad and a Heavenly Father who knows them so well.
We thank you Lord that motherhood goes well beyond having babies.
We thank you Lord for the many mothers in our lives who have taught us about Your character, Your compassion and Your love.
May Covenant Church be a haven of families who love moms and who love children well. May we live out the scriptures by meeting them where THEY are, loving them, serving them, and leading them to You.
May we act justly, love mercy and walk humbly with you.
In Jesus name we pray, Amen.

Mother's Day 2011, Covenant Church (A special thank you to Kristin, Beth, and the many words of inspiration from blogs, books and of course the Bible.)

Small Sacrifices

We submitted our application to adopt from Ethiopia on Christmas Day. Since that time we have made some small sacrifices in our family in order to move forward with this adoption. For us, a sacrifice may look like this: skiing on the gentle slopes of Lake Nockamixon this winter instead of spending the weekends on the ski slopes, seeing the holiday lights in our local community instead of going to our favorite city on the east coast-NYC, eating lunch after church at home although the kids (and often Marco) are pleading to go eat Chinese buffet, buying drugstore makeup instead of some of my favorite Mary Kay products, having my dear husband once again color my VERY grey hair instead of going to the salon once a month, canceling our YMCA family membership and our daily newspaper, and deciding to buy a retainer for my missing tooth (from my kids orthodontist) which contains a fake tooth to wear at night until I can put in an implant. Yes, I am from WV, so really what is one missing tooth?

Wow--what an interesting list. Anyone who knows my husband, knows how THRIFTY he is. He has never hired anyone to paint, fix, mow, clean, plant, assemble, repair, or take apart. Our very first house was an old log cabin, with oil heat. He once went to the library (this was before the internet) and read a book about how to clean and repair our heater. He has diagnosed many of our kids and pets, and cars-- instead of taking them to the dr or auto repair shop. (Thank goodness I am not quite as thrifty, and do take them to the dr when needed:)

We really do try to make our $$$ go a bit further, but as I noted in my last post, we can always do better. We can do better because we have been GIVEN MUCH. Just thinking about the sacrifices that the birth family of our little girl in Africa is making brings tears to my eyes. They are making the decision to place their little girl in an orphanage for a better life. Maybe they are sick, and maybe she is too. They have not been GIVEN MUCH and do not have many material possessions to give up, they do not have YMCA memberships or a house full of stuff.

They are making the REAL sacrifice, which brings me to the sacrifice that God made for us. His only son. How much is He asking us to give up? He has not asked us to give up our children, but he has asked us to "give".

"Give. Give generously, abundantly, and sacrificially. Give not because your stuff is bad. Give because Christ is in you. Give because your heart has been captured by a Savior who has produced in you "overflowing joy," welling up in "rich generosity." (Radical, by David Platt)

This is the kind of sacrifice I want my family to make for the orphans of the world. This is the purpose He has given to us, and with this we must act. We need to make greater sacrifices. How will this look for your family?

"Always something new to make you happy"

Always something new to make you happy--this is the new Marshall's slogan. I love Marshalls (I actually worked there during college:). I love to shop. I grew up in WV and shopping was an ALL DAY AFFAIR. The nearest mall was an hour away-- so my mom, my sister and usually my grandma, aunt and girl cousins all went shopping together. This always included at least two meals, sometimes three WITH dessert. This also included many hours of bonding, laughing, and bargain hunting with my family. Now, I'm not blaming my childhood memories of endless hours of shopping on why shopping makes me feel good, but it does really make me feel good. I could go all day and spend $20. I can just go into a store to browse for hours, it has become a stress reliever for me. But here is the problem. I no longer live an hour away from the good stores, actually Marshalls is just a few minutes away. As a mom with young kids, I would often tell my husband that I was going to pick up some milk (by myself) and end up at Marshalls and Kohls and Target. This is a problem. It became my drug of choice. Just finding a little something here or there--you know I NEVER bought large ticket items without consulting my husband first. BUT--I was (and still am) very good at buying the little things. "But they were so cheap, but it was buy one get one half off, but she doesn't have a pair of purple sparkly flip flops and they were only $3, but the boys really wanted durags to get into their culture a bit--knowing full well that they would never actually wear them"!! Yes, this is the mind game that I play with myself, and this is usually the game that I play with my husband.
We have a house FULL of stuff. What really makes me happy? What really makes my family happy? All the stuff?? Nope. Well, maybe for a while. Those really cute spring flats with flowers on them might make me happy for a few months that spring. But by next spring, I want a new pair, poka-dots this time. Not because they are all worn out, but because I want something new. Always something different to make me happy--I'm the perfect Marshalls slogan.
My Bible study is working in this very subject right now. YES--I love it when the Lord works that way! Just when I needed it:) Shopping has become an idol for me. There, I said it. (And it is only my third blog post!)Now, what can I do?
During this adoption process, more than any other time in the past, we HAVE to cut back. We HAVE to find creative ways to not only afford the adoption, but afford another child in our home. My husband works hard, and we should have plenty left over. But we don't. This is my deepest, darkest struggle. I manage every month to spend it. And as he says, I can make it go far, but I still spend it. BUT-what I have found during these last few months is that my desire to spend it is LESS! I have prayed that the Lord would just make me NOT want to spend. So--when I see those cute little spring dresses, I now stop and really think. Does Bella NEED another cute little dress? Maybe the answer is yes--actually last week in Costco I found a little flowery dress from Carters for only $7.50. (What a bargain--I know this because they are at least $10 in other stores.) So, I bought that dress. Then lost it. Yep--went to put it on her for church the next day--could not find it ANYWHERE! So, I guess that was a little lesson, reminding me that she never really needed the dress. And hopefully someone found it in the parking lot and needed it even more! But--at least before I buy I really think about it, and sometimes even say a little prayer right there! And guess what --it works. Do I still find myself in a store when I have a few minutes or hours ALONE?? Yep. But often I come out empty handed, and actually the shopping really doesn't bring me to that "high" so much anymore. I still love those times when I can spend time shopping with friends or family, or take my boys on a shopping date with mom--but more as a bonding experience than anything else. I am now realizing THAT is what REALLY makes me happy, the kind of happy that doesn't wear off after one season. The kind of happy that is pleasing to God, to my husband and to my family.

HIV--The Truth

Here I am again:)) I forgot to mention the video that I put up on HIV--The TRUTH Pandemic. The reason we are on this journey once again is because God placed it in our hearts to adopt an HIV+ little girl. This was not an easy decision. It was only after much research, prayer, more research and more prayer that we have decided to walk in obedience down this road. I cannot tell you how long HIV has been on my heart--perhaps for 10 years or more. I CAN tell you that it WAS NOT on my husband's heart-- his job is protect our family, and he felt that he could not do this while parenting a child who is HIV+. It was only after understanding the TRUTH about HIV and how it spreads that the Lord worked on his heart as well. And here we are--advocating and educating. Understanding that through this process, we will be on our knees daily. I hope to document through this blog our fears, our concerns, our highs and our lows. I hope to write honestly and openly. I hope that the people I love the most will stand up and support us, regardless. But I'm not so sure at this time.

Here we are!!

Ok, I am not a writer.  Actually I do not like to write, it kind of makes me anxious and moody.  But, I know that as a mom who has been on an incrediable journey with God to create our family and to care for the orphan, I need to share.  I love to talk, I love to encourage and to support, but writing it all down is really not my thing.  But, HERE WE ARE.  I have no technical skills and will be relying on my dear husband to help me with this, and I am sure that he will write some posts too, he actually likes to write.  I also have a dear friend who can be found here who has encouraged me to just start, so I am.  As I take the time to document my family, where we have been and where we are going, I pray that I will inspire others to take the journey too.  Yep, step out of our comfort zones a bit and take that leap of faith. That's what I am doing here, thanks for joining our journey!